


Is it ok if I feel sad?

by L_lefty



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Bad Parent Alice Cooper (Archie Comics), F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Violence, Thanksgiving
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2019-12-04
Packaged: 2021-02-18 03:41:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21671224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/L_lefty/pseuds/L_lefty
Summary: An extension of episode 4.7 the Ice Storm. Betty struggling to cope with her first Thanksgiving with Hal dead.
Relationships: Betty Cooper/Jughead Jones
Comments: 2
Kudos: 40





	Is it ok if I feel sad?

**Author's Note:**

> After seeing photos of Alice in therapy with Betty my mind started thinking of ways that might have come about

It was the Saturday of the Thanksgiving weekend and Betty sat at the table surrounded by her family feeling awful.

The long weekend had started so well, she had got some quality alone time with Jughead and done some investigating.  
It had been perfect, or as close to perfect as they ever got. 

When Jughead had suggested she come up and stay she was ecstatic, it meant she could ignore the holiday and try and ignore her feelings. She had hoped by being away she could push her thoughts to the back of her mind. 

The feelings she had that she knew were wrong, the feelings of missing her dad.  
Then Jughead had suggested they come back for the rest of the weekend to support Archie and she knew she had to. Betty Cooper was a good friend and that's exactly what Archie needed at a time like this. His first Thanksgiving without his dad. 

She knew that technically it was her second thanksgiving without her dad but this was the first since her dad's death. It had confused her why no one had asked how she was doing and as no one had asked she hasn't mentioned it. 

Despite knowing it was the right thing to do, she'd had to physically drag herself out of Jughead's bed to make the journey back.  
She hadn't been able to help feeling sick as she watched them unveil the plaque at the gymnasium for Fred.  
Don't get her wrong she was glad he was being honoured and he deserved that. She missed him too, having grown up along side him with Archie and Jughead. 

The plaque just seemed to highlight how different their dads were and perhaps as well how different the Coopers were in general from the good people of Riverdale.

In a lot of ways he was a better father figure than her own dad ever was which made her an even worse person for missing her own dad so much.  
She was really glad Archie got to talk about his dad and how much he missed him and his feelings. 

Veronica and Jughead and herself had sat there and comforted him and she was happy they could do that. But it also left her feeling bitter and that feeling had lingered all weekend.

It had firmly taken root as they had an impromptu family meal as an alternative to Thanksgiving which they had all spend separately. 

JB was back from her moms and Charles, of course was round too. He had claimed he was working when asked what he had done on the Thursday.

Alice had made some food, not quite as lavish as her normal Thanksgiving feast but very close to that.  
Not that Betty got to try much of it. Her mom had plated up her food giving her meagre portions of everything. 

At the disbelieving face Jughead had pulled at her, Alice had immediately been defensive. "I heard all about your vending machine feast and I'm sure Betty is still full from that. Besides her eyes are often bigger then her stomach, she can get more if she is still hungry." Alice had said and moved on quickly before anyone else could comment.

It seemed the old highly strung, highly judgemental Alice had returned that day as she had donned her apron.  
Betty had wondering if her mom was thinking the same things she was but was too scared of being chastised to ask.

As was common growing up, when her mom had a bee in her bonnet about something. Betty had noticed Alice would ignore it and try to put a perfect veneer on things to presumably wish them away. 

Betty also knew from experience this never worked and there would always be someones tears shed before bedtime.  
They all started eating and chatting and Betty zoned out. She vaguely picked at her food but she was feeling angry and if her mom wanted to restrict her diet she just wasn't going to eat anything.

She knew it was childish and stupid but this whole weekend had just been getting harder and harder to bear. She felt restless and fidgety and on edge and she knew Jughead could tell from the seemingly subtle looks he was sending her every so often. 

She zoned in as Charles finished telling a story about a favourite childhood Thanksgiving.  
JB had then chimed in with a funny story about a thanks giving that a local stray cat had ruined by coming in their home and getting stuck in their turkey. 

Betty couldn't help but feel a little bit of warmth, happy that the Jone's had a few good childhood memories despite all the bad ones they undoubtably had. 

"I have a picture of that stuck cat " Jughead said scratching his head in thought before excusing himself from the table to go get it from a box upstairs. 

"Remember that Thanksgiving our fridge freezer malfunctioned in the night and dad had to go out and managed to find us another turkey on the day." Betty says chuckling at the memory and turning to her mom. They had all been so cheered and triumphant when he returned with it.

"No Elisabeth I don't" Alice said curtly, taking a large sip of her wine. She had slowly been making her way through a bottle of red since lunch time.  
"Mom we had some good times despite everything that happened, I'm allowed to talk about that in my own home." Betty stated her pain roaring up in her again although doubt licked at her mind.

"No Elisabeth you can't, he was an evil man and you talking about him in that way is wrong. It's making a mockery of all his victims."  
All Betty could think was 'I'm a bad person' over and over again on loop in her mind.

She couldn't do this right now, she needed some time and some space and maybe she could try and sort out how she was feeling. Maybe she could stop herself from having all these bad thoughts.

Betty got to feet quickly, the uneaten plate of food in hand and headed over the the kitchen. She didn't want to eat and she didn't think she could pretend to be some perfect person right now.  
"What do you think you are doing young lady" Alice said leaving the table and coming up to stand next to her in the kitchen as FP, JB and Charles all looked on.

"Everyone wants to sit around and talk about past thanksgiving memories and I can't do that so I should probably leave you all too it. I'm a bad person and don't want to ruin anyones fun." Betty ranted feeling her temper rise.

"Stop throwing a tantrum Elisabeth, you are part of this family so you will sit down and be at the table with us like the normal family we are. You are being hysterical." Alice angrily stated sounding slightly hysterical herself.

"There is nothing normal about you, you ran off with a cult for months and abandoned me." Betty stated her voice raising as she let out thoughts she hadn't said aloud. "And now you're back and micromanaging my life and my eating like some kind of psychopath. To be honest I don't know who's messed me up more, you or dad." Betty stated.

She felt for the first time in a long time her fingers curl down in her palms and pierce her flesh in an unconscious attempt to feel grounded.

The sudden pain that errupted in her cheek took her by suprise and her eyes stung with tears. Her mom had slapped her.  
Her mum had never done that before and was just stood in front of her body heaving and eyes wide in shock.

Everyone else was silent staring at them in disbelief.  
At that moment Jughead came bounding down the stairs photo held aloft in triumph.

He paused when he entered the room taking in the scene in front of him. His family sat silently at the table while Alice and Betty were stood face to face with a bright red mark blooming on Betty's cheek. As was often the case he was able to read the room quickly. 

"What the hell! Betty, did she hit you?" Jughead questioned making his way towards Betty ready to hold her and comfort her and protect her from what ever the hell was going on here. 

Betty felt sick again and sad and overwhelmed. Her cheek stung and her palms felt sore. Her mind felt jumbled, did she deserve this, she must be bad for her mum to be treating her this way.

"I'm not feeling well." Betty said shakily addressing everyone " I'm sorry I need to go and lie down. Everyone carry on enjoying the food. I'm sorry." And she fled up the stairs and they heard her door slam shut. 

Jughead froze torn between rushing after his love and chewing Alice out.  
He was outraged how dare she touch her like that. Alice could wait he decided and realising he was still holding the photo. He went over to hand it to JB before heading towards the stairs.

"Boy, maybe Betty just needs some space to calm down" FP called out.  
"No dad, what Betty needs is understanding and comfort." Jughead stated and continued his journey towards the stairs.  
He briefly turned again "JB save me some pie" he said winking at her and giving her a brief smile.

God he hoped JB wasnt being affected too much by all the things she was witnessing in this house. He headed up the stairs determined to give his girlfriend the support she deserved.

He opened her bedroom door and found her sat on the floor leaning against her bed staring down at her raw looking hands.  
She had broken the skin but there was little blood. 

It had been a long time since she had done this. Part of him was proud she had been using better coping strategies and part was worried he'd missed how much everything was getting to her.

He approached her slowly, heart breaking for his girl who had been through too much.  
He placed himself on the floor in front of her and gently cupped her hands and brought them to his lips kissing them softly, reminiscent of that time in the booth in pop's so long ago. 

He had though at that time it was impossible to love Betty any more but his love for her had just grown over the years.  
Tears spilt from Betty's eyes "I'm sorry Jug, there is something really wrong with me. I shouldn't be feeling and thinking these things." 

"No Betty, there is nothing wrong with the way you feel or the way you think. What happened?" Jug asked his heart hurting for her.  
He softly wiped her cheeks and left his hand cupping her face. He felt satisfied as she leaned against his hand seeking comfort. 

She explained her eyes down cast, not just about what had gone on between her mum and herself earlier but how she had been feeling all weekend.  
The conflict, the pain and how bad it made her all feel. Just being able to off load to him everything she had been feeling helped a little knowing he wouldn't judge her. 

"I'm so sorry I've been so wrapped up in the mysteries at my school I didn't even stop to think how, of course, you were going to be affected by this weekend." He gently tilted her face making sure she was looking him in the eyes "You are allowed to miss your dad Betty and I'm sorry you aren't able to talk about it as freely as you would like. I just want you to know you can always talk about it with me."

Betty smiled softly at him, feeling the calm presence he brought to her and like so many times before she believed him.  
Her cheek still stung and her head ached with a headache but as she pushed herself into Jughead's embrace she felt comforted. 

She pulled back after a while " Jug I think i need to talk to someone, a professional." Jughead nodded slowly "Yeah I think that would help having an independent view on everything." He said feeling proud she wanted to take action to help herself heal.

" Why don't we lie down for a while" he said guiding her to the bed and embracing her from behind.  
They lay there for a while him rubbing soothing circles on her arm as he heard her breathing gradually even out as she fell asleep. 

As Betty drifted to sleep she couldn't help be grateful that she had Jughead in her life.


End file.
